A fairy story from Baconsdozen
Ten years ago a man called Mr B started selling tools from this shop
in the town of Lowstuff. Soon,Mr B also sold clothing and supplies to fishing
boats in the town of Lowstuff and other places but then along came some baddies
from a place called EU and made the fishermen smash all their boats up.A big
chief called Morley from a place called Par-liar-ment promised Mr B and everyone
else who had lost money and customers,lots of grants and help but although lots
of people who already had lots of money got even more ,Mr B got bugger
all.
Mr B still carried on running his shop,but then the bogey men from
Woefully Dismal Council dug the roads up for two and a half years and scared all
the locals and visitors away from the town with traffic jams. Mr B decided to go
more into mail order and the internet.Whilst making sure other shops had loading
bays to use ,Woefully Dismal Council next decided it would be a good idea
to stop any delivery vans and customers still making it past the jams from
stopping anywhere near Mr B's shop by painting big yellow lines on the path one
dark night. A few days later they built a bus stop for imaginary people to get
on and off imaginary buses further down the road but told Mr B that he would
have to get real lorries and vans up his little narrow back passage (painfull)
for his deliveries and collections .What they didn't tell Mr B was they'd they
stuck a concrete post in the middle of it to make it even more narrow but before
you could say "whatever next" a fairy godmother came along with a big lorry and
knocked it over . Mr B tried to get help,some people called Kownsillors promised
to help but only at a quarter to election time not afterwards,and there was
someone called an Hombudzeman,but they turned out to have no teeth.Mr B even
dreamt a Blizzard came and put the wind up the Council but knew that would only
ever be a dream.Mr B can't even get permission from Woefully Dismal Council to
change the use of the shop to a house because they say the Magic North Sea will
come and drown him.It's called the Magic Sea because although they say it will
flood him and his shop,they say it won't flood the places either
side.
Perhaps the Magic Sea is punishing Mr B for selling stuff to those
nasty fishermen so they could catch its fish
.
Baconsdozen shop in Lowestoft.
We are now concentrating on the internet side of the business,selling
new whitworth/BSF,af and metric tools.We export so called obsolete imperial
tools all over the world mainly for classic car and motorcycle enthusiasts.We
sell some tools still made in England,from factories that have been making
spanners and wrenches for many years.We source tools from other countries but
only sell tools that are fit for professional use,we also auction tools at sites
like Ebay.If you need tools for an older vehicle,made in the days before planned
obsolescence and plastic wood,give us a call.
The view from my bedroom window,one
of the best reasons for staying here.
Looking over the trawl dock and the entrance to
Oulton Broad,the buildings and yachts comprise the yacht club, in the background
is the North Sea.There is periodic talk of redevelopment,with waterside
apartments and posh marinas just like you can find in a hundred other towns and
cities.Personally I'd like to see it turned into a working fishing
museum.